Stupid teenage movie...

Josie and the pussycats.

This isn't a rant on about how much I hate that movie, because I honestly don't. It just pointed out a lot of things I'm insecure about in friendships, interests, and my future.
It was on the TV today, Brighton told me to watch it. I remember watching it with my cousin Cadee a long time ago but I didn't really remember anything about the movie. Watching it, I started getting this feeling in my stomach, one of those... awkward feelings. I didn't know why, it just was like painful. But as I watched it more, I realized what it was... My relationship /with/ Brighton. In the movie there's Josie, the main character who needs to be reminded of her talents by Valerie, and needed to be led by her friend's good vibes. But she's the front-man of the band (not changing it to front girl shut up) and she obviously will get most of the attention, whether the other two girls (Melody and Valerie) are just as talented and out-going. Valerie starts getting very insecure, unnoticed by everyone (I thought it was a racist thing, but Idk. They never approach it.) and it gets progressively worse as their fame skyrocketed.
Now I should probably start explaining how me and my friends fit into this whole thing (though, the only people who might read this probably already understand...) Me and Brighton are music junkies who want to make it in the 'biz. And I've become such a jealous bitch with everything, I am constantly thinking 'look at everyone look at Brighton, they love her not me, I shouldn't be here.' but at the same time I know that she kind of maybe needs me a little bit... Or I try to tell myself that.
I'm not musically inclined, I can sing just as well as Courtney Love can type and I am just not good with instruments, I'm just not! But I want to be in a band so badly, I want to change lives, I want to be told by some fan that I 'saved their life.' But I'll probably end up being one of those 36 year olds who think they still have a chance... But I digress, she wants to be in a band as well, she writes songs, sing better than me, plays bass& some guitar... I've been in the imaginary band (i assume) but I feel it's only because I'm the friend... Thats kind of the feeling I got from Valerie she was just the best friend and backup group. Nothing special.
So that's how I feel with basically all of my friends, I'm the backup group. They'd fail without me, but I'm not doing anything worth noting.

And towards the end, when they have Josie brainwashed and she says those things to them, I just got this image in my head... Being told that. It hurt so much, and then I thought... 'who said you'd ever get there, fag?' which really didn't help.
But of course, she some how shakes it and saves the day! Hooray! Blah.
I don't know, I'm a fat teenage kid who doesn't even know what gender they are... Of course I have to complain about everything.